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I have wanted to learn how to play the bass for quite a while. But I've never done anything about it because it all seems too intimidating. I'm afraid of messing up, so I don't start, so I don't get past the "I mess up everything!" phase.

Let me tell you about my ridiculous goal: I want to be able to play like James Jamerson. Some of you reading this, right now, are laughing at me, either hysterically, or derisively, or both at the same time (although I am not quite sure what that would sound like.) When I say "I want to be able to play like James Jamerson" I don't mean I want to play all of the Motown classics, note for note, so that I can play the bass exactly like he does. (Although I do have a partiality to I Was Made to Love Her, so I am probably going to have to learn that one at some point.)

No, what I mean when I say "I want to be able to play like James Jamerson" is I want to be able to improvise a bass line over a set of chords. This is still ridiculously ambitious, for a fella who would have a real hard time picking out a C# on the fretboard in under 6 seconds. But still, I'm not going to get anywhere sitting on my ass complaining about how hard something is that I want to learn.

I used to think that improvising was just, getting the notes in my head out of my head and on to the instrument. Maybe that is all it is, but something happens between my head and my hands. I mean, I know the notes in my head and what they sound like, but I have no idea how to make those notes with an actual, real, honest-to-God, made-out-of-wood-and-not-air bass.

I know for sure that I can play the root of the chord on the bass, that is the easy part. During the chord, I can also play the other notes in the chord. And, I have since come to learn (after googling a bit) that another thing you can do is figure out a few scales, and then you can apply those scales to certain chords. So for a certain set of chords in a major key, you can play the pentatonic scale starting on the root of the chord you are playing, and all those notes will sound good (most of the time.)

So I have made baby steps with learning scales. Chord theory. Things like that. One of the realizations I came to a few weeks ago is this:

There's 12 notes. That's all you got. That's all anyone's got. Everyone has got to form their own relationship with the chromatic scale. How you break it down, how you split it up, where you live in those 12 tones is entirely up to you and the scale.

So think about that. Let it really soak in. Because if all you are doing with your musical life is trying to play exactly like Mr. Awesome, and learn all of their solos note for note, and try to copy their relationship to the scale, man, I don't know, it seems to me like the only thing you're going to get good at is copying. I've done the slavish copying thing with other instruments, and it's a lot less useful than it looks.

Don't get me wrong, it's good to learn things from other people. One of the ways you can do that is to learn how they see the world through the music they create. You just have to balance the note-for-note copying with learning the fundamentals. That's a lesson I wish I would have learned a long time ago.

So that is where I am at right now. Figurin' out these notes. Tryin' to get to the point where I can know them all individually, and call them all by name, get to know their favorite ice cream flavors. Maybe someday we can be good friends instead of awkward acquaintances.

Man, I didn't even mean to tell you all that. Tonight I realized I have an even more fundamental problem with the bass, and I am going to have to tell you about that later, because it is already way past my bedtime.

2yo: "Thomas... robot?"
Me: "You want to know if Thomas the train is a robot?"
2yo: "Uh-huh."
Me (after thinking a bit): "No honey, Thomas can't be a robot, he doesn't obey the three laws of robotics."

This is an ancient Michigan Tech elixir for keeping warm when you have to spend all day outside. You can get everything you need at the local co-op.

1 quart of water
1 rounded tsp cloves
1 rounded tsp peppercorns
1/2 to 1 full stick cinnamon
A fair sized chunk of ginger (about thumb sized)
2 rounded tsp. peppermint
Milk
Maple syrup (REAL maple syrup!) or agave syrup

Crack the cinnamon into chunks with a hammer. Simmer cinnamon, cloves, and peppercorns in the water for about ten minutes. Thinly slice ginger and add it in. Simmer for another 5-10 minutes. Remove from heat, add peppermint. Steep for 5-10 minutes.

Strain out everything, return to pan, add milk and syrup to taste. You will probably have to add around half a cup to a full cup of milk, but add as much as you like. Real maple syrup is the traditional flavoring, but agave syrup will do in a pinch.

Put in a thermos and drink for as long as you are outside. It will keep you nice and warm. It's also absolutely wonderful when you are sick. The cinnamon really helps with throat problems.

Alternate directions: do not strain. Let cool, put in fridge overnight, and strain in the morning. It will be much stronger and more bitter. You will have to add more milk and syrup, to counteract the bitterness, but the final product is a little heartier.

Alternate alternate directions: Crack 1 rounded tsp cardamom pods, put them in with the cloves and peppercorns. Do not add ginger. Instead of mint tea, steep 2-4 tsp black tea for the recommended time for your particular tea. Strain, add milk and syrup as above. Now you have chai!

On Monday night I got to hang out with Ian and Dave of Down and Above. I made a couple of amps for them as Christmas presents and, well, between their schedules and my schedule, it took a while to come up with a mutually agreed upon time to hang out.

Here's Ian trying it out for the first time:

It was a lot of fun to hang out and get feedback on the Stella. Ian and Dave both really liked how it sounded at maximum volume levels. If you crank all the knobs, the Stella starts self-oscillating and sounding weird. But if you play a power chord through it, you get a super thick, fat fuzz. When you hold the sustain and let the chord naturally die out, the sound starts swelling and breaking up in a unique way that is hard to describe.

As a harmonica player, I don't crank it that high, since these kinds of volume levels lead to feedback problems. But for the guitar, it sounds awesome.

The nice thing is, the Stella doesn't start oscillating right away if you cut the note off, so you can get away with a little syncopation.

A little caveat: this is how it sounds if you power the Stella Amp with anything from 4.5-6 volts. At higher power supply levels, like 9 volts or so, it cuts out more instead of giving a nice sustained fuzz when playing it cranked. In the video above, the amp is running at 6 volts (4 AA batteries).

So I have been working like a madman getting ready for the Minne Faire. It's coming up in a week! April 13 and 14 at the Hack Factory.

I will have a booth again this year. If you are in the Minneapolis-St. Paul area you should come by and check it out. Last year I had a solar powered amplifier, this year I still don't know what I'm going to bring because I don't know what I'll have time to finish. One thing I am 99 percent done with is my prototype optical theramin:

It's a ton of fun. $8.00 if you buy a ticket online, $10.00 at the door. Kids under 15 get in free.

Batter and fry up 4-5 chicken livers. Set aside to cool a bit. Crumble livers onto a bed of greens. Liberally apply some freshly made Penzey's Italian salad dressing. Toss.

Serves one.

A couple of months ago, I had a Christmas sale planned, but due to some bad planning on my part, followed by a supplier who accidentally sent the wrong parts, I ran out of things to sell before I could put them on sale. :-(

So instead of a Christmas Sale, I'm having a Valentines Day Sale! It's exactly the same discount only it's in a completely different month!

The sale is going to be three dollars off a Stella Amp kit, from now until February 14th. It's Christmas in February!

One more thing. If you want to get your special someone a battery powered guitar amplifier, but neither you nor your loved one knows how to solder, then don't forget you can pick up a pre-assembled Stella Amp kit from Solderbot! (I don't think they're having a Valentine's Day sale though.)

A friend of mine gave me an old Super Graphic recently. It had been in his basement for quite some time and had gotten a bit musty. After my experiences with the basement flooding and the mold, this was something I wasn't terribly happy about, but I figured I could do something about the problem and not vaguely ignore it.

I googled some variation of 'clean musty super graphic' and came upon a few pages that recommended wiping it down with [vinegar / dilute vinegar / dilute bleach / Formula 409] and letting it dry for a few days.

I didn't have any Formula 409. I do have this amazing cleaning solution that I made from vinegar and orange peels (fill jar with orange peels, fill jar with vinegar, put in fridge for a few weeks). The vinegar / orange peel solution is really thick though, so I diluted it down with a little extra vinegar and some water.

I grabbed a bunch of q-tips and cotton balls, and started to work. Of course, I had my ever-present helper elves with me.

(Fortunately these older cameras are fairly sturdy. My 20 month old son (that's his hand at the extreme left in the picture above) thinks that "gentle" means "I'm not throwing it at the moment.")

I left the camera opened up for a few days and now everything on the camera smells faintly of plastic from the 1970s. I call that a success.

I cannot embed the video here, but go check out this clip about synthesizers from 3-2-1 Contact (1980).

Coming soon.